Empty as HSP with dissociation

I notice different mental and physical symptoms every day. I notice all kinds of stimuli every day through my more sensitive senses. As HSP, I can quickly notice small things, whether I like it or not. Because of my negative childhood in a family with the presence of the mental disorders PTSD, (open and hidden) narcissism, codependency, gaslighting (cunning manipulation technique of hidden narcissism) and TPS, I still notice consequences of it every day. Every day we are busy with things that are not tangible. No one can scientifically demonstrate with a device that these things really exist. I wonder what I do every day. Because maybe life doesn't really exist. Maybe the chaos in my head doesn't really exist. Maybe nothing really exists. I am interested in (para)parapsychology, but I have never dealt with these questions before. I am never in an obsessive way or in an extreme way busy with topics. I don't have to know or understand everything. There are things in life that I can better accept as they are. As HSS, I keep trying and experiencing, in all respects. As long as I am busy in a conscious way and in a positive way with things that are not tangible, I will not be bothered by them.