Bugs and Bikes and Squids, Oh, My! Vol. I

Bugs and Bikes and Squids, Oh, My! Vol. I, is a collection of essays exploring the nuances and not-so-subtle aspects of motorcycling. A middle-aged right of passage visited upon motorcyclists is license to adorn a page with wit and wisdom, excessively fertilized and overly salted, steeped in the notion that there are people who might want to read such silliness. Motorcyclists with leathers older than their spawn think they are funny, and their decades of motorcycling knight them with a royal right to pontificate. And to use every adjective ever learned to sound smarter than they really are. The American dream of motorcycling projects an image of a lone biker (or, conversely, a gaggle of such) exploring this great continent's vastness on American motorcycles. Almost all motorcyclists in the U. S. do not have the luxury or the inclination to get their motor running and head out on the highway for weeks, months, or life-times at a time. This book could speak to those who explore motorcycling closer to home. It's okay not to have decades of experience augmented with hundreds of thousands of miles in the saddle. Referencing invertebrates is not as random as it might seem. There is a subspecies of motorcycles rider called a squid. Squids are young people who lack the maturity to assess their own mortality. It would be accurate to suggest all of us went through this stage in our motorcycling career, but that doesn't make their stupidity impact my insurance rates any less. The Urban Dictionary defines a squid as: "A young motorcyclist who overestimates his abilities, boasts of his riding skills when in reality he has none. Squid bikes are usually decorated with chrome and various anodized bits. Rear tires are too wide for their own good, swingarm extended. Really slow in the corners, and sudden bursts of acceleration when a straight appears. Squids wear no protection, deeming themselves invincible. This fact compounds itself because they engage in 'extreme riding'--performing wheelies and stoppies in public areas. Squids wreck a lot." Another definition from operationmilitarykids.org goes a little like this: "A term used in the old Navy (not the store), Squid is what other branches. (especially Marines) generally called sailors. The term refers to the aquatic animal and how it can swim fast in a straight line but, similar to inexperienced motorcyclists, have trouble quickly changing directions."Bugs and Bikes and Squids, Oh, My! Vol. I, will only reference squids as belonging to the family of invertebrates. For this book, squids on motorcycles deserve no more.